Help wanted: Guns Save Life, purveyors of rusty, clunker guns to do-gooders with deep wallets and shallow minds, is seeking members and friends between the ages of 18-30 to take advantage of this fine opportunity to visit the big city of Chicago to sell rusted trash in exchange for money to be used for training young people to shoot safely and responsibly.  We will provide lawfully armed escorts.

Event information:

Date:  Saturday, August 16, 2014

Place:  St. Sabina’s Church, 1210 W. 78th Place, Chicago (come early or wear your body armor)

Bounty/Booty:  $100 gift card per “working” gun.  The gift card will more than likely be a pre-paid VISA card or similar.

Restriction:  One gun per person, first 150 total, and those turning in guns must be between 16-30 years of age.

“No questions asked” event – although we suspect if you come in wearing oxygen and using a cane, they might quiz you about your age.  Ditto on male pattern baldness and gray hair.

We’ve got some guns we’ve been collecting for just such an event.  It should be fun!

St. Sabina Church to Host Gun Buyback Day

AUBURN GRESHAM (DNA Info) — Following through with a promise he made in April to rid his South Side community of illegal guns, the Rev. Michael Pfleger will host a gun buyback day on Aug 16.

The event runs from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. later this month at St. Sabina, 1210 W. 78th Pl., and no questions will be asked to anyone turning in a “working” gun, Pfleger said.

“Obviously we don’t want a broken down piece of metal being turned in so we will have a law enforcement officer on site to examine all guns turned in,” Pfleger said.

The gun buyback is for only for the first 150 people between 16 and 30 years old. Those who turn in a gun will receive either a $100 gift card or a pair of adidas gym shoes, Pfleger said. Gift cards will be distributed at the event, but those who choose to receive gym shoes will have to come back within a week to pick them up.

“There will be a list of shoes they can choose from that adidas will provide us,” Pfleger said. “I want to target this age group becaue research has shown that gun violence has the greatest impact on this group the most.”

UPDATE:

The plot thickens!